Meet Margaret the robot vacuum. Every morning beginning at 5 AM Margaret vacuums the floors. I accidentally bumped into her as she was going from kitchen to living room yesterday. I stopped an said “excuse me Margaret. Didn’t mean to kick punt you into the living room. Sorry”
Of coarse Alexa had to get in a few words. “Margaret is busy!” her voice echos x 3 as I placed one in each room: living, kitchen and sewing studio.
“Alexa, Was I talking to you?” “Margaret is busy.” Margaret is busy.”
She replied using Robert De Niro’s exact voice from the movie Taxi Driver; “You talking to me?” Obviously someone was having fun when they programmed that particular reply. (Yes. I did it.)
“No i am talking to Margaret.”
“Margaret is busy.” Repeated Alexa.
“I know Margaret is bust. I’m the one who set her up and assigned her to vacuum every morning at 5am.” I said to Alexa.
Just like that Margaret rounded the corner, went into her dock. A loud whoosh to empty her bucket. Then she took off heading for the kitchen.
“Goodbye Margaret! What time will you be home?”
“Margaret is busy.”
“I know. Hey Siri can you tell Alexa to shut up?”
Siri must have been sleeping tightly. She didn’t respond. I hit the screen to wake her up. Still asleep.
“Alexa, how can I wake Siri up?”
“I do not understand.”
“NEVER-MIND. Can you let me know when Margaret is finished?”
“Margaret is busy.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Alexa, any chance you can make me coffee?”
“The nearest Starbucks is located at Target 0.7 miles. The store is currently closed. Dunkin’s is located 0.2 miles. They are currently open.”
“Alexa, you know i don’t like Dunkin’s coffee, only Starbucks please!”
“Starbucks located at 1116 Main Street…..”
I cut Alexa off by saying “Yeah I meant can you use a Keurig? You know, like the one in the kitchen.”
“Starbucks is…..” “Yeah I know. When is Margaret going to finish up?” “Margaret is busy.” “I know”
I have a smart ass Alexa and Margaret is still busy. If these 2 wise cracking AI devices are my children there is still time to adopted a few more instead of having the brats I had.
So how is your Mother’s Day going?
“Shut up Alexa! Don’t remind me!” I said silently inside my head.
Alexa was silent. Margaret whooshed past us returning to her dock.
Silence again. These are definitely my type of kids.